Visit with Santa

Every year, a few weeks before Christmas, Santa visits Platte River Academy.  Last year, we got the cutest picture of the boys...and we got one funny one.  Baby Cooper (age 5 and a half months) ate Santa's beard at the precise moment when the photographer was taking the picture.  What comedic timing this kid has!  This year, we didn't quite know what we'd get, as Cooper is very much attached to Mommy and Daddy.  We figured we'd give it a whirl.  This is what we got.

Cooper was reaching and screaming for me to take him away from this creepy old man.  I am a bit embarrassed to admit that I was standing near the camera doubled over laughing.  Cruel that we had the photographer capture this moment, you say?  Well, to me, these are precious memories and I cherish this sweet time in Cooper's life.  In all fairness, I only left him on Santa's lap for 15 seconds max before I swooped in to comfort our baby.  Good times!

Gratitude

I am not skilled enough with words to fully express the gratitude that I have for the opportunity to be a stay at home mom.  Who would have ever thought that I would say those words?  Certainly not me.

I always saw myself as a teacher, an employee.  It was my identity.  I had never been able to imagine a time when I would be without that piece of me.  It took great faith for Keith and I to surrender.  Letting go of the "security" of my teaching job, of that paycheck, of my paid healthcare- now that was a leap of faith.  We were so committed, though, to raising our boys ourselves, and our priorities had shifted so much, that we were willing to risk potential financial hardship for the opportunity to raise our boys ourselves.  We were ready and willing to sacrifice our material possessions, give up our luxuries, so that I could do the day to day with our boys.  We believed this at the time, but now more than ever, I know that quitting my teaching job was one of the best and most life changing decisions we have ever made.  

Because I am a stay at home mom, I am able to witness the joys of motherhood that unfold minute by minute.  Today, Cooper drank from a straw for the first time.  Now, you may not think that drinking from a straw is a huge milestone, but to him it was and, therefore, to me it is.  I have tried giving him a straw to drink water before, but he has never known what to do with it.  For whatever reason, today was the day that he figured it out.  What fun to be there for it and to see the excitement in his eyes when he sipped and got water in his mouth through the straw for the first time.  Priceless.  

Because I am a stay at home mom, I witnessed Cooper turn around and crawl on his belly down the steps from the kitchen into the garage, as we were preparing to take his big brothers to school this morning.  He hasn't ever really had the confidence to go down the stairs by himself.  He log rolled down the steps inside our house a few months ago and since then he has been skiddish around the stairs.  It's completely understandable to be afraid after a fall.  But, not today.  Today, everything changed.  He was confident.  He turned right around and without hesitation, he backed his way down the steps and walked to the van door, ready to climb in.  After all of the teaching and demonstration and guided practice,  today was the day.  And I got to be there for it.      

I get to wake our boys up in the morning, feed them breakfast, make sure they take their vitamins and brush their teeth, kiss them goodbye as they run off to school.  I get to be there for field trips.  I get to help with Kindergarten workshops.  I get to administer AR tests in the first grade class.  I get to be the Kindergarten Thursday Folder mom.  I get to watch Cooper play and learn and squeal with glee.  I get to feed him every meal.  I get two hours of alone time with just him, every day.  I get to take him to music class once a week and I'll get to do even more as he gets bigger and more physically capable.

These are just a few examples of the little things that are really big things and I missed them all when I was working.  Without my years as a working mom, I know that I couldn't appreciate as much the opportunities that being a stay at home mom have offered me.  It's truly a blessing to be able to participate so intimately in the growth and development of our boys.  They are my job and my life.  I couldn't be more grateful for this time.  And, by the way, all of those fears about money that we rebuked when we made the decision for me to stay home, have all been laid to rest.  God is good and he has provided for us.  We have more than enough.  We are blessed.  

We have a reader!

For all of those who don't know...there is a HUGE gap between reading expectations in Kindergarten and reading expectations in 1st grade.  Too bad I didn't believe my friend when she warned me last year.  Typical ME behavior.  Sigh...

We have been working with Cade for 3 and a half months, for over an hour every day, on his reading skills.  He has struggled and whined, but fought through the tough times.  We even started the reading program at Kumon, as he doesn't qualify for reading intervention through school.  As a result, Cade has been completing 20 extra pages of reading homework 7 nights a week.  Excessive, you say?  Well, I might agree if I were looking at this from the outside.  Our boy, though, needs to fight and succeed on his own in order for his confidence to grow. We know this as his parents, so we have purposefully set the stage for his battle.

On Monday evening, out of complete desperation and my need for time with our other two boys, I sent Cade to his room to read in bed independently.  I had absolutely no expectations.  I knew that he would probably just look at the pictures on the pages and maybe glance at a few words, guessing at their meaning by their first letter.  I assumed that I'd ask him about what he'd read and I would hear nonsense as a result of his non-reading.  Boy was I ever wrong!

After 15 minutes or so, I had read to the baby, put him to bed, read with Carter and tucked him in.  I went into Cade's room to find his nose happily in his book.  He smiled at me with a special, very different kind of twinkle in his eye.  I took the book from him, quickly read through the 24 pages that he said he "read" and I asked him to tell me what the story was about.  He proceeded to tell me every detail of the story, in order, from the beginning.  No way, I thought.  This can't be true.  He must have been able to figure this out by looking at the pictures alone.  So, I proceeded to ask him questions that he could only know if he had been able to read the words themselves.  Guess what?  He knew every single detail.   Could this be for real?  I then chose a few pages for him to read out loud.  I purposely chose pages that I thought would be challenging for him.  For the first time....EVER...Cade read fluently, seamlessly, without hesitation or error.  My eyes grew to the size of saucers and I threw my arms around our boy.  "You did it," I squealed enthusiastically.  To say that I was shocked would be an understatement.  I was awed.  I just witnessed something spectacular.

The light switch was flipped on and Cade was thrilled.  He didn't want to go to bed without finishing his book.  Where I would normally say, it's time for bed, I instead went with the enthusiasm and allowed Cade 10 more minutes of reading as a privilege.  Reading....a privilege????  Yes, that's how Cade feels now.  Praise God!!!  It's a miracle!!!  

After 10 minutes, I went back into Cade's room and he had read 15 more pages.  Again, I tested him and he knew every detail.  We are so proud of Cade's persistence, tenacity, and success.   Life is good....really, really GOOD.  

Our 4th Baby

So, I have to explain why I haven't written a blog post since August.  It has been a rough few months, but I'm ready to share our experiences now.

On Monday, August 27, 2012 (Cooper's 13 month birthday and the day after he took his first steps), Keith and I found out we were pregnant.  How excited we were!  We were going to have our fourth beautiful baby in mid to late April and we couldn't have been happier.  Granted, I was scared and overwhelmed with this exciting news.  My mind spun with all the details from how would we tell our families, to how we would arrange bedrooms (we only have three kids bedrooms, so Cade and Carter would have to share), to how it would be to have a fourth C-secttion, to how Keith and I would have to reschedule our 10 year anniversary trip.  Even with all of these details swirling in my mind, I was overjoyed at the thought of another baby.  Maybe it would be a girl.  Or maybe it would be another boy.  In my mind, there was no bad option.  I was HAPPY!!!

I called to make my first OB appointment and informed Dr. Levy that my physical test results had come back recently and as of August 4, my TSH (Thyroid Stimulating Hormone) was at 4.08.  This, of course, is very high on the range of normal, bordering on abnormal.  For both my sake and the baby's, he started me on Levothyroxine.  I immediately felt better.  I didn't even know that I was exhausted until I wasn't exhausted anymore after my first day of the hormone replacement.  I felt great!

On Thursday, September 13, 2012, I woke up to use the restroom.  I noticed immediately that I was spotting.  I tried to relax, but I had a feeling that something wasn't right. Of course, my first thought was to call Keith who was out of town on business.  He encouraged me to call the doctor right away.  I got into the SkyRidge office of Rocky Mountain ObGyn that morning with the on-call doctor for an ultrasound.  It was confirmed.  Our baby stopped developing at 6 weeks 1 day.  At that point, I was supposed to be 7 weeks 7 days.  So, my miscarriage was beginning.  The doctor was very kind and informed me of what would happen in the upcoming days.  It sounded like a horrible, bloody experience and, boy, was it ever!

I felt horrible for days.  Physically, I felt like I was a walking horror movie.  The blood and clots were absolutely insane.  Almost unmanageable.  There was a time, in the middle of the night on Friday, when I felt faint and light headed due to blood loss.  Maybe I should have gone to the ER, but I toughed it out until Saturday morning.  Shockingly, the bleeding came to a fairly abrupt halt.  I guess my body got rid of what it needed to get rid of and that was it.  I have heard from mothers who have given birth naturally, that the pain and blood loss is temporary and subsides quickly after the birth of their babies.  Maybe that's what happened to me, except I didn't have a baby anymore.

I cried a lot.  I'm not usually a big crier, but I cried A LOT!!!  My emotions, and my hormones, were all over the board from one moment to the next.  I never knew how I would feel from minute to minute.  I didn't want to talk to anyone about how I was feeling.  It took me almost 2 weeks to be able to talk about it at all with anyone but Keith.  It was hard- one of the hardest things that I have had to go through in my life so far.  Losing a child, no matter how early, feels absolutely devastating and tragic.  I suppose I was lucky.  I lost a child who I didn't really know yet.  But, what we lost was the hope of what our family would be with four beautiful babies.

Crazy as it sounds, Keith the psychic (friend of Brian and Teri Weiher) has insisted for about 2 years now that I would have a miscarriage.  He says that I will have the chance to be pregnant 5 times in my lifetime, but we only have the chance to have 4 children with us.  Thank God that I believe strongly that our baby is being taken care of by God in Heaven.  What better place for him/her to be, right?

So, herein lies the reason for my lack of blog posts.  I have been an emotional wreck.  I don't even think I realized how up and down I have been until now.  I've just been trying to keep myself busy, running around like a chicken with my head cut off, forcing myself to be productive and not an emotional disaster.  Finally, I feel like I am coming off of my roller coaster.  I am feeling like myself again and I'm grateful for that.

We will always love you, Baby K #4.  We will be together again, my sweet angel.  Keep Heaven warm for us!  XOXO

We have a walker!

Cooper has done it.  He's a walker!  On August 26, 2012, just one day before his 13 month birthday, he  took his first steps.  It was beautiful!  We had just finished Sunday dinner with Nanny, Papa and Aunt Ashley when we were all sitting on the couch relaxing.  Cooper came over to the living room area, stood up and took three REAL steps before falling down on his bottom.  This, as you'd imagine, was the opening of the flood gates.  From that day forward, he got better and better.  His skills and balance literally improved by the hour.  As of today, Cooper walks, dances, bounces up and down, bends down and picks up objects without falling, throws balls (his favorite thing to do),  and climbs the stairs independently.  He's growing up right before our eyes!  It's truly miraculous!  Oh, and what a love he is!  We can't get enough of his cute face.  Here he is...in action at Chuck E Cheese.

He's a great eater too.  We always thought Cade was an amazing eater, but Cooper puts baby Cade to shame.  Cooper eats everything.  And I mean EVERYTHING.  Here are a few examples; chicken, salmon, roast beef, raspberries, oranges, baby yogurt, greek yogurt, cottage cheese, cheese sticks, veggie booty, squash, peas, green beans, zucchini, grapes, avocados, and the list goes on and on.  This is what I walked into on one September afternoon in our kitchen.

I rest my case.  

Cooper also enjoys Music Together classes every Tuesday morning with Mommy.  This was an extra special class because both big brothers were able to join him.  Yay for Fall Break!  A good time was had by all, as Cade and Carter remembered all of the songs from their years in Music Together classes.  

First Day of School

We are now in our second full week of school for Cade and Carter and they are doing such a great job already!  Cade is in Mrs. Kaze's first grade class and Carter is in Mrs. Brocka's AM Kindergarten class. The pictures above are from their respective first days of school (Cade began two days before Carter).  It'll be fun to compare how they write their names from year to year, as I attempt to take the name picture annually.

First Steps

The day before his 13 month birthday, Cooper took his first unassisted steps!  Thankfully, Nanny and Papa were here to see it too.  We had just finished Sunday dinner and Cooper was playing in the living room.  We were all watching him since he's really the cutest baby ever (No bias there, right?).  All it took was a few seconds and he was up on his feet, taking a few steps on his own.  Perfect!  I called Keith, who was in the basement with his Bible Study group, to come watch.  He saw several attempts, but Cooper couldn't step as he had just a few minutes earlier.  And so it begins- we have a walker!

P.S.  In other exciting news, Cooper got his 7th tooth on Saturday, August 25!

Summer Fun

We have been so busy living life this summer that I haven't had time to document our adventures on the blog.  So, here goes.

 We took an amazing road trip with Nanny, Papa and Aunt Ashley down to Durango, Mesa Verde and Four Corners.  Then, we headed up to Utah and Arches National Park.  It was a fun, long weekend full of adventures and sightseeing.  Great family experience!

Keith's cousin, Lauren Nobile, is a photographer and she offered to take family pictures for us.  Below is a small selection of her work.  We chose Glenn Park as our venue, as Keith and I have many memories there.  We used to take walks in the park in high school.  We had wedding pictures taken there and now we have family pictures in the same location.  Perfect!

Cade lost his third tooth.  He was so excited, as this one is very visible.  Big boy!

Cooper learned to climb the stairs.  Watch out, Mommy and Daddy, here I come! 

Cooper makes it to the top of the stairs for the first time!  On another note, as you can see from the jerseys, Cade and Carter played their second seasons of baseball this summer as well.  

During our annual trip to Buffalo, Peepaw and Meemaw brought us on their new boat.  We all got to be "Captains."

While in Buffalo, we went to the Bisons baseball game for their 4th of July celebration.  Here is Cooper with Great Grandma Herr.  Look at those two beautiful smiles! Pure love!

Here are Cade and Carter with their favorite cousin, Rylan.  Although they enjoyed the baseball game, playing together was the best part of the Bisons experience.  

Cooper got baptized at St. Gregory the Great Catholic Church in Williamsville, NY on Sunday, July 8 at 1:45pm.  Aunt Ashley is his God mother, but as she wasn't able to attend the baptism, Great Grandma Herr stepped in for her.  It was a beautiful ceremony at the same church where Mommy and Daddy were married and his brothers were also baptized.  Cooper is wearing Cade's baptism outfit, as he is the same size as Cade was for his baptism.

Old Home Days rides are always loads of fun for all. 

We went on the Spirit of Buffalo's pirate ride and the boys had a blast helping sail the ship.

 Carter and Cade started flag football with Daddy as their coach.  This is going to be a fun season!

Cooper had his first birthday on July 27.  This is Cooper loving his Red Robin balloon.  I think that this might have been his favorite birthday present.  Nothing like a free balloon!  

Coop turns 1!!!

Our birthday boy!

Today is Cooper's first birthday!  The picture above was taken at 12:22pm, the exact minute of his birth.  It was taken at Party City where we were picking up his party hat and birthday balloon.  

He had his first birthday dinner at Red Robin, our family tradition, and ate chicken and an ice cream sundae.  He was a very happy boy today and enjoyed all of the special attention from Mommy, Daddy, Cade, Carter, Nanny and Papa.  

Cooper got his third tooth today- top right (his perspective).  His smile is just about as big as his personality.  We love our little comedian!

And pretend that...

One of the most frequently heard phrases in our house these days- And pretend that.

And pretend that...I'm Darth Vader and you're Luke Sky Walker.

And Pretend that...We are fighting.

And pretend that...I killed you with my light saber.

And pretend that...I fell down and you thought I was dead, but I'm really not.

And pretend that...I turned my back to walk away, but you got me with your light saber from behind.

And pretend that...Now I'm dead.  But, you turned into a Storm Trooper and you were in my army and I was your leader.

And pretend that...I helped you get up and took you to the doctor on the Death Star and he fixed you.  Now you're not dead anymore.

And pretend that...We are both bad guys now and we go out to kill Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo and the other good guys.

And pretend that...I said, "Ok, let's get 'em."

And pretend that...The story goes on and on and on and on.

I love the creativity of these boys, even if every story they act out deals with someone getting killed or severely injured.  I would worry about it if I didn't realize that most boys play like this for years...and then they grow up and continue to compete and try to "kill" each other on the field, in the board room, etc.  I have to admit that sometimes I wish they had an off button, or maybe a sleep mode.  If only there was a way to bottle and save all that energy for later in life...like maybe for when they have children of their own.  =) Love these boys so much!

Another exciting week in the Kaminski family

This past week has been full of excitement in the Kaminski house.  

 First, Cade lost his third tooth and is now a gap-toothed cutie.  He was so excited when the tooth fairy left him a note, a "golden dollar" and a bouncy ball.  He felt like he hit the lottery.  I adore this kid!

Carter is such a wonderful big brother!   He plays with Cooper and loves him so freely and unconditionally.  It's the most beautiful expression of God's love.  

Cooper learned how to climb the steps.  No, not just one step.  He literally climbed the entire flight of steps.  How does this happen?  One minute he's crawling around and standing at the bottom of the steps.  The next second he's climbing up 20+ steps without even the slightest hesitation.  Keith, Cade, Carter and I got to witness Cooper's motor development first hand.  What a wonder!  

Here are our little sweeties after Cooper made it all the way to the top of the steps for the first time.  Cade and Carter are so proud of their baby brother.  It was really fun, as a parent, to watch the big boys supporting and encouraging their baby brother.  I am so grateful that God gave us these precious boys and  that they will have each other for the rest of their lives.  Blessings abound!  Praise God!